Dear Lesli: Life is Happening DON'T FREAK OUT!

 

picture via Jason Van Dyk  Flicker

James 1:12(CEB)

12 Those who stand firm during testing are blessed. They are tried and true. They will receive the life God has promised to those who love him as their reward.

Yesterday  all of my  worries  unfolded and  exploded all over  yesterdays  post. (lol)  I fought with the thoughts of :  Am I doing the right thing, Should I even be  doing this?  There  is  nothing like a  upcoming birthday  to  get you caught up in your  feelings  and  second guessing EVERY decision   you've every made in life. In my heart I know that I  must  remember  to  base my life  on  what God says  not   "feelings" .  Emotions are  fleeting  and can  have your mind  spinning in a  whirlwind. 

This morning I resolved to  declutter  my mind and the   space around me . I    cleaned by room  lite a candle and began to  sort through my thoughts.  I found this lingering  question floating around my  head.  "Where is your  FAITH?"         Monday I  gave  all  of my  fears , insecurities anxiety a  platform  and placed  all of my  focus on those them but  what happen to my  faith? In my heart I know God hasn't forgotten about me and to effectivly  get through this season in my life I must   focus on  Christ.  It's  time  that I shift  my thinking  instead of  giving  my  fears a  spotlight  I will  meditate on the promises of  God.  So  below  are a few that I'd like to share that you may reference  back on  in your quiet times and we'll  get through  these hurdles in life  with the assurance of  the  Christ Jesus who intercedes on our  behalf.

“The Lord is the one who goes ahead of you; He will be with you. He will not fail you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.” —Deuteronomy 31:8

“Do not fear, for I am with you; do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.” —Isaiah 41:10  

25 “So I tell you to stop worrying about what you will eat, drink, or wear. Isn't life more than food and the body more than clothes?26 “Look at the birds. They don’t plant, harvest, or gather the harvest into barns. Yet, your heavenly Father feeds them. Aren't you worth more than they?27 “Can any of you add a single hour to your life by worrying? Matthew 6:25

“Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” —Philippians 4:6-7

I hope that  this helps in fact I know that  it will,  you just  have to enter into his  promises with an  open heart. We were not meant to   carry all of burdens  on our  own and  to be quite  honest I don't want to . I know with  whats going on in our world  and what we have to  deal with in our  personal lives    it's hard to find  balance.  More than ever we  need to rely on God and give Him each  and every worry, fear and  anxiety.  Ask that  God would  fill you with  the  joy only He can  give and  don't give in  to  fleeting  emotions.  God has us in the palm of His  hands.

Connect with me online!  I'm @lesliallynblogs  everywhere also  feel free to  email me at  thelesliallynblog@yahoo.com  

Love,

32 years Old in 9 Days?!?! ....I'm not ready!

The following is me unedited  and  thinking out loud you've been warned...lol


Today did  NOT go as planned at all!   This morning the plan was to get up  clean up a bit and  film a  video. I spent the better part of the day attempting to set  up.  I filmed a few clips but just could not  get into the groove of things.  I found that  I  was  becoming frustrated  meanwhile  forcing  myself to put on this fake smile on camera  and then my  camera  battery died!  lol  So   I just had to take a  step back , breathe and  regroup.  * deeps  breaths

Guys, in  9 days I'll be turning 32 years old and  I'm not ready!  Now I know  logically that I'm being a  bit  dramatic and whether   I'm  ready or  not  on Thursday I'll be  32 years old.  What makes this  birthday so different  from   the others is  where I am currently.  I am at this crossroad in my life where I need to  REALLY  figure out  what I want and where I am going.   To be  completely  honest  and transparent  I am embarrassed that I don't  KNOW yet; Shouldn't I know  by now?


The truth is  as  isolated as I feel right now I know that there a  a lot  of  30 somethings that  find themselves feeling similarly  and   are contemplating  their  next move.   So  what do we do guys?  Not having  a plan  is  scary  but  remaining the  same is  far  more  painful. I  seem to have more insight when it comes to  helping others at times  but when it  comes to me I am  clueless.  

What I do know is that  God  has me in this  particular  space in my life for a reason , there is  something I  am supposed to do and   learn in this time  and I just pray that I am open and  receptive  enough to move forward.  I don't  want  to  spend  my   the rest of my life standing in the same  spot expecting  and expecting things to change.  I apologize  for  this  weird post my mind is  all over the place  and  I just needed to vent. Hopefully things will be back to  bushiness as  usual  tomorrow. Talk to  you guys  soon!

Love,

Our Youth: You Life Matters.

Leviticus 19:15 (NCV)

15 “‘Be fair in your judging. You must not show special favor to poor people or great people, but be fair when you judge your neighbor.

It has been a  difficult week to say the least. The  story of  Micheal Brown has exploded all over social media and  in the press.  It's heartbreaking to see  the practice of unnecessary force  being used in the  Ferguson  community as well and violence that is taking place each day there.  It's very  disheartening to  witness how  some  abuse the  platform they've been given. We live in a  society where the  guilty are being  protected for their evil and the  innocent are fighting for their  right to exist.

Over the years I've daydreamed about having a son of my own and  how  I'd teach him about God and  nurture his dreams.   But today I am legitimately concerned about even having children; I don't want to  worry about them becoming another  walking target.  In light of all that is taking  place how do we  explain this to our  sons?  Why do we have to explain to our  young black youth  that due  to  the  hate  garnered in the  hearts  of  those abuse their platform  you  will have to be careful in  simply walking down the street? The  inherent  right  to feel free and protected is something that is  slowly being erased.

In spite of all that has happened  we must teach our  son about God and what He says about them. We  must let our sons know that they have value and that their  lives matter, that they are  loved! We cannot  always  protect them from bad things but we can equip them with the tools to  push through by letting them know that   God will never leave or forsake them and in times of  trouble  we must  rely on him only.

Dear  God,

I pray that your hand  would be on our son and the youth in the upcoming  generation. Help those who  find themselves trying to process what's taking place in this world and bring them peace in knowing that you prepare the path ahead of them and that you will cover them.  We pray that  you would bring peace and justice to the community of  Ferguson,Missouri and that the  violence  will stop.  These things we pray in Jesus's name. -Amen

What Can I Possibly Offer to Anyone?

Matthew 3:14-15 (CEB)14 John tried to stop him and said, “I need to be baptized by you, yet you come to me?”15 Jesus answered, “Allow me to be baptized now. This is necessary to fulfill all righteousness.”So John agreed to baptize Jesus.

When there is a calling on your life it  often times  appears too  big  or  you may  feel unqualified. In my  case my task is to be   "support" somewhat of a   counselor.  I've  tired  to  escape this  title over the past few years by isolating myself, pushing people and  away or just literally disappearing.  I felt like I had nothing to offer because I was dealing with my own  depression  coupled with  anxiety attacks and personal insecurities.  What could I possibly have  to   offer with  everything that I am already  carrying?  Who am I to  console or give  advice to anyone? I'm tired!

The position of  support is  a heavy task and lifting others  up over time  can  leave you  with sore arms and and a   drained spirit .  I just wanted to stop I didn't want to hear anymore bad news or deal with anyone  else's  issues.  So I successfully  pushed everyone away and I currently  I have no  friends. I have to admit that as a text book  introvert this  isn't completely   awful for me BUT  I do recognize the  need to connect with others and  how  good  friends  can  enrich your life.  It's important to  know who is enriches your  life and who  constantly  subtracts. But that's a  whole   blog post in and of itself!


Currently I am trying to   take full advantage of  this  "unemployed to self employed"  season.  I'm not  confident that I want to  be self employed honestly but I know that I want to be  in control of my time and my efforts. I come to realize that  every time I start a    new  journal,  blog or whatever it  always  turns into this.  A  devotional/ Free Therapy " things"  but I  never  intend for it to  be.  I have no qualifications other than life experience and  the portion of wisdom God has gifted me with.  So  with what I have  and  this  free time I am going to  follow the leading of the holy spirit and  allow God to   move me, change my mind  and  my perspective on what I have to  offer.  This is what I am supposed to be  doing.  I am  a  counselor   , I am a  cheerleader  that is my mission and I can  no longer  run from it. I am it and it is me; I don't know where this will take me  or  if I'll always  use this platform or if it will evolve into   something  else down the line   like a  book or something . What I do know is that in order to  grow and  move forward   I must   allow myself to be open enough to be God led and  not  Lesli led .   I must  fully trust  God and know that He  has me in this space at this time for a reason.


Pray for me and I'll  pray for you ..

Love,

Micheal Brown: A Prayer for Justice.

In light of  this  past weekends events in St.Louis  where  18 year old   Micheal Brown  (unarmed)  was killed by a   local  police officer- I  would like  to take a moment to lift  Micheal's  parents, their family and the  Ferguson community up in prayer.


Dear  Lord,

I submit this  prayer  along with many around the world  who's heart break for  the  brown family.  The  pain of losing  a child is  unimaginable so  Lord  I pray that the peace that only you  can  bring will comfort , only  you can  bring light into this dark situation.  I lift up  Micheal's  parent in prayer and ask that you would   mend their broken hearts, place your arms  around them  and help them to  stand firm as  they  seek justice  for  their son.  Lord I pray that you   would orchestrate  positive change for within  the   Ferguson community; Please  grace  them with the  wisdom to cry out to you for change  and  peacefully  seek   justice   through you  and  not take things into  their own hands. We need an outpouring of your spirit and your  love to  restore the peace, safety and justice to the Ferguson  community.  I pray that your  hands would be  in every effort to bring positive  change.    In Jesus's name  -Amen


Love,

Let's Talk : Why you Should FORGIVE.

Forgiveness is  a  sore spot for   a lot  of people including myself. I've wasted   years of my  life   walking around with this cloud of  unforgiveness floating above my head with no resolution.  But  I've  learned  over the years that  when  you hold on to  grudges you lock yourself into a  prison along with your pain. You may also find that you lock others out of your life who could potentially  add value to your life. .  So today I'll share with you what changed my perspective.

What Changed My  Heart? : Three things.

• The pain that I was  clutching onto served no purpose other than to  keep me stuck in time  storing the   offense in my heart.
• The other party was either unaware of the offense or simply didn't care.
• I realized  keeping  a rolodex of the event punishes me  more than  one that  caused the hurt.

Now what  actually solidified my need to  change my heart  was this  verse:

Matthew 6:14The Message (MSG)14-15 “In prayer there is a connection between what God does and what you do. You can’t get forgiveness from God, for instance, without also forgiving others. If you refuse to do your part, you cut yourself off from God’s part.

Intense  right? We all want God to  forgive us right? I don't know about you but I've have not lived a pristine life  and there are things I need to be forgiven for. So how can  I receive forgiveness  if  I  don't do my  part  in letting go of  resentment? By holding on to  a grudge we  are  essentially cutting ourselves out of forgiveness . "if you refuse to do your part, you cut yourself off from God's part".  Ever read the Lord's Prayer? I've said it, you may have said it;  Remember this  part?  "Forgive us our debts as  we  forgive our debtors".   What that statement means is, God  forgive me only  to the extent that I forgive  others.

How does Forgiveness Work? :

Forgiving someone doesn't dilute the  pain that was  caused or  excuse  the one who hurt you; Forgiveness pin points the issue and actively  peruses peace with the issue instead of holding on to  it.  There is such freedom in letting go and allowing God to heal that area of your life. 

Here's  a  quote from  blog entitled Forgiveness vs. Restoration by  Rick Warren  that  helped me put things into perspective.

Let me explain what forgiveness is not. Forgiveness does not mean the instant restoration of trust. Forgiveness is instant. Trust must be rebuilt over time. Forgiveness is based on grace. Trust is built on works. You earn trust. You don’t earn forgiveness

Lastly  for those who are  still  dealing with  painful events in your life I want to encourage you to live  a free and full life. Throw  down your  burdens at the feet of the master and ask that God  fill those  gaps in your life and  and restore your broken  heart so that you may  really  LIVE  to the full without dragging  any chains from the  past. In Jesus's name -Amen


God bless you!

Love, Lesli.

Waiting Until Marriage: 31 Year old virgin...on PURPOSE!

Yes, you read the  title correctly  I'm  31 yrs old  and  a virgin...on PURPOSE!  Here's why..

WHY AM I WAITING TO BE INTIMATE UNTIL MARRIAGE? :

At a  pretty young age  I'd  say about 8-10 yrs old I can  vividly remember having a conversation in the car with my mom one day after church about  desire to "wait until marriage".  I went into detail  on  why  it  meant so much  to me and why I felt it was so important. Growing up   attending   Children's Church   we were taught to a degree about saving yourself for marriage  but  it  wasn't  something that was really explained in  detail .  My mom  never sat me down and  explained why I should wait  or talked to  be about  sex in general for that matter unless I had  a question and  from there she would explain it in a way that I could  understand.

 My decision to not have premarital sex was based on a  promise that I made to God. 

Thinking back on this  decision that I made so young  was huge, why  did  I make such a difficult  promise, where did I get all this  wisdom and  conviction  so early on from?  I always jokingly say that I've  been  31 years old for  31 years.  lol  I've  been  blessed to  have had  a  fairly good head on my  shoulders and  perhaps  bit  more wisdom from the beginning  and this is  all due honestly to  being surrounded by  my  mother  and  grandmother 90% of the time and studying them constantly.  As I said before there was never a definitive conversation  about premarital  sex but I learned  so much  from watching  my elders.

Remaining  a virgin   hasn't been a  easy  path to take and I would be lying if I said I had never  toyed with the idea  of  sex outside of marriage.... But I'll get more into  that in part two of  31 Year Old Virgin so stay tuned!

I'd love to connect with you on social media  you can find me  on  Instagram and Facebook @lesliallynblogs or  email me  at  lesliallynblogs@yahoo.com


Up next...

Why and  how I've kept my  promise and  promise and  the difficulties that I've faced along the way.