“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.” - 2 Corinthians 1:3-4
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| Picture taken and edited by Lesli Allyn |
If I can be completely honest with you all, I've been avoiding this subject matter for awhile partly because I am in some way still grieving but I felt led to share so I hope that in sharing my story that it will somehow help someone else who is dealing with the passing of a loved one.
Ok so here goes...
2004 was was met with a significant amount of loss within our family. Between April 2004- November 2004 my Father, Grandfather and aunt passed leaving my grandmother, mom, one cousin and myself. To put things into perspective my immediate family was very small to begin with 6 in all; So if you can imagine losing all of people that you loved and meant the most to you all within a year it goes without saying that this period of time was THE most devastating experience of my life. Fast forward to about 2007 my Mother, grandmother and I moved from Jacksonville, Fl to Atlanta, this a huge change but ultimately the best decision for each of us.
My grandmother grew to really love it here in Atlanta and she was the happiest that we had seen her in quite some time it meant the world to my mom and I to see her smiling and happy again. My grandmother later passed on February 25th, 2008 and in 2012 my cousin passed suddenly.
I realize that this is a lot to take in trust me it was even harder to live through but I did live through it! Let's be clear it was only the grace of God that got me through the tremendous weight of the painful anxiety attacks and depression I was experiencing. I found myself relying on God more than I ever had at the time we weren't actively attending church but thankful a great friend at the time introduced my mom and I to our current church which changed my life and set the pace for my healing.
You may be wondering how I got over all of this? The truth is I haven't "gotten over it" I've grown through it. Moving forward took time and what I've learned is that the grieving process is a necessary part of healing so don't skip it. Seek God with all that you have; Don't try to fill the void with people , things or work you need to give yourself the time to process everything. Trust me God will mend the broken pieces of your heart but glossing over the pain will do more harm than good in the long run.
My advice would be to take each day as it comes because each day will be different. You will get through this season of your life; The good news is that the heartache that you feel right now wont always consume you. Remember, it's ok to move forward; Moving forward with your life does not mean that you forget about your loved one and what they meant to you, you are allowed to be happy. One of the things that helped me with this is writing out exactly how I was feeling and pouring my heart out to God. Some books that I'd recommend are Life's Healing Choices and The Purpose Driven life they helped me tremendously.
This was a difficult post to write but very healing at the same time. I hope that I've helped in some way. If you're in a place where you are completely overwhelmed please don't give up reach out to God and people that will walk with you through this time in your life. You're life matters, you are loved and you will make it through this. Share your story could be the very thing someone else needs to hear to help them in their time of grieving.
Love,
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