Thursday, July 17, 2014

My Open Diary : What am I Going To Do With My Life?

Two weeks ago    I lost my job...


So here's the story I had just gotten back from a  family reunion  in  Philadelphia.  We had a blast  we drove from  Atlanta  all the way to downtown  Philly for the first time ever!  I get back to work two days before  the 4th of  July.  That  morning I felt odd  I kept having this reoccurring thought  in my head of  " Am I really going back here?"

I get  to my office  and  walk  to my department and notice that the lead  data entry  clerk's desk is  cleaned out!  I thought great he  quit and I'll have to take on  his work load as well as my own.  Later, another coworker arrives and I emailed him and asked  about   the  lead data entry clerk. Me:  What  happened to ----?  Co-Worker: The week you were out  the company did a bunch of layoffs and  He was let go along with  a few others.

Wow..wait! #thoughtbubble  He  had been  employed there way longer than I,  why  was he let  go instead of me?  Good question and I was about to find out.


After  working  about four hours my  supervisor walks to my desk and asked me to come to her  office. Welp!  Here we go   I already knew I was  as  good and  gone.   We sat and in her office was the administrative assistant.  She went over all the  details  to which I barely heard  much  of because all I could think of  is how bitter sweet this  moment was.  Honestly at  that point I was  more than ready to move on but I'm also one that is afraid of change.

Fast forward to today and I have no clue what I want to do with my life. Anxiety   peeks it's little  head  in and   I have to admit   this is not at all  where I wanted to be in my life at  31 years old ( I'll be 32 next month) .  My  vision for my life  was to be  in a serious  relationship  or  married with a family and career that I was proud of. 

So what do you do when  life doesn't   turn out the way you've envisioned?

to be continued.

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