Tuesday, August 12, 2014

What Can I Possibly Offer to Anyone?




Matthew 3:14-15 (CEB)14 John tried to stop him and said, “I need to be baptized by you, yet you come to me?”15 Jesus answered, “Allow me to be baptized now. This is necessary to fulfill all righteousness.”So John agreed to baptize Jesus.


When there is a calling on your life it  often times  appears too  big  or  you may  feel unqualified. In my  case my task is to be   "support" somewhat of a   counselor.  I've  tired  to  escape this  title over the past few years by isolating myself, pushing people and  away or just literally disappearing.  I felt like I had nothing to offer because I was dealing with my own  depression  coupled with  anxiety attacks and personal insecurities.  What could I possibly have  to   offer with  everything that I am already  carrying?  Who am I to  console or give  advice to anyone? I'm tired!

The position of  support is  a heavy task and lifting others  up over time  can  leave you  with sore arms and and a   drained spirit .  I just wanted to stop I didn't want to hear anymore bad news or deal with anyone  else's  issues.  So I successfully  pushed everyone away and I currently  I have no  friends. I have to admit that as a text book  introvert this  isn't completely   awful for me BUT  I do recognize the  need to connect with others and  how  good  friends  can  enrich your life.  It's important to  know who is enriches your  life and who  constantly  subtracts. But that's a  whole   blog post in and of itself!


Currently I am trying to   take full advantage of  this  "unemployed to self employed"  season.  I'm not  confident that I want to  be self employed honestly but I know that I want to be  in control of my time and my efforts. I come to realize that  every time I start a    new  journal,  blog or whatever it  always  turns into this.  A  devotional/ Free Therapy " things"  but I  never  intend for it to  be.  I have no qualifications other than life experience and  the portion of wisdom God has gifted me with.  So  with what I have  and  this  free time I am going to  follow the leading of the holy spirit and  allow God to   move me, change my mind  and  my perspective on what I have to  offer.  This is what I am supposed to be  doing.  I am  a  counselor   , I am a  cheerleader  that is my mission and I can  no longer  run from it. I am it and it is me; I don't know where this will take me  or  if I'll always  use this platform or if it will evolve into   something  else down the line   like a  book or something . What I do know is that in order to  grow and  move forward   I must   allow myself to be open enough to be God led and  not  Lesli led .   I must  fully trust  God and know that He  has me in this space at this time for a reason.


Pray for me and I'll  pray for you ..

Love,






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